| While dealing with death, you need strategies for | | | | shows there. I was at my personal best making and |
| coping with the passing of a loved one. My coping skills | | | | altering costumes, assisting the actors with dressing for |
| were therapy sessions with my psychologist, having | | | | their characters, and yes, even acting in a few small |
| something to look forward to, and doing something | | | | roles. It was a thrill to see the costumes that I had |
| new. All three helped me to move on with my life. | | | | made up on the stage for all to see. |
| I knew, without a doubt, that I would be dealing with | | | | The first show I worked on after Larry died was The |
| grief as a widow by the time I was forty. My | | | | Glass Menagerie. While working on that show, I was |
| husband's health issues turned his heart into a ticking | | | | able to concentrate on doing something that I loved |
| time bomb and when that time bomb did explode, I had | | | | instead of being in my own "coffin" of grief. I was once |
| to adjust my life to one without Larry. | | | | again among the living. After a few months of |
| After suffering from depression for many years, I had | | | | rehearsals and productions, I was ready to do |
| finally realized that I needed help. I started therapy | | | | something new. |
| sessions with a psychologist about a month before | | | | For a short time, I tossed around the idea of opening a |
| Larry died. When that time had come, I was grateful | | | | sewing and alterations shop. I discussed this idea with |
| that I already had someone I could talk with about the | | | | my psychologist and she suggested that if I felt good |
| feelings and questions I had about his death. Larry had | | | | about it, to go ahead and follow through with it. I had |
| been driving a truck for his employer when a passerby | | | | set aside enough money to be able to rent a small |
| stopped to see if he needed assistance since the | | | | space that had plenty of people traffic, have a cutting |
| truck was parked at the side of the road. Larry was | | | | table and small dressing room built, and have a little bit |
| alone in the truck slumped over to his right side. An | | | | left over for any sewing supplies I would need. I |
| ambulance was called to the scene but the EMTs | | | | already had a sewing machine, desk, iron, and ironing |
| could not revive him. | | | | board. After I got everything set up, The Sewing |
| I had several questions about what Larry may have | | | | Basket was open for business. |
| gone through during the last moments of his life. Did he | | | | I realized that opening the shop was the best medicine |
| have a heart attack or stroke? Was he in much pain | | | | for me at that time. I was in contact with people every |
| and for how long? What were his last thoughts? Did | | | | day and became plenty busy with the sewing and |
| he even think of me and our two daughters? Why | | | | alterations I did for my customers. I was beginning to |
| was he alone? | | | | come around to being my "normal" self again, and not |
| For a few month after Larry died, I felt so alone...he | | | | just depressed and missing someone who had been a |
| was never coming home again. I felt guilty, too, for not | | | | part of my life for just over seventeen years. |
| being with him because I knew that I could have gotten | | | | Having to live without my husband after he died was a |
| help to him quicker. I would go to a local fast food | | | | long but bearable journey. If I hadn't continued the |
| restaurant to read for hours and have a meal so that I | | | | therapy sessions, I believe that I would have become |
| wouldn't have to be at home without him there. | | | | more deeply depressed than I already was. If it |
| Thankfully, there was something that I was looking | | | | weren't for me using my long-established sewing talent |
| forward to that I knew would help ease my heartache. | | | | in creative and profitable outlets, I would have allowed |
| Casting call was coming up pretty soon for a theater | | | | myself to be more isolated, too. These were important |
| production at the local junior college. I had previously | | | | coping skills for me during my early months of coping |
| volunteered my sewing talent for costuming other | | | | with the passing of my loved one. |